Moving Forward

I wanted to take this opportunity to thank everyone for their support and patience over the past month and a half since we lost our precious baby.  I truly appreciate it and I cannot express enough how much this has meant to me.  I can honestly say that this has been the hardest time in my life and while I am doing much better now, I still definitely have moments. 

Physically, I've been struggling to get healthy since we lost the baby;  the miscarriage caused my fibro to flare up and my immune system to crash so I've spent the past few month and a half dealing with bronchitis and sinus infections.  Emotionally, I cannot yet walk through the baby section at Target or even by the maternity clothes department at Kohl's.  I notice every pregnant lady around me and didn't expect to break down in tears when I found out a friend is due the same week I would have been despite the fact I am so excited for them.  I also don't think our culture knows how to deal with grief very well; it isn't a comfortable topic for most people and thus we tend to resort to anecdotal sayings in hope of comforting the person.  Being on this side of it now, I have to admit that the most comforting thing for me was people just gave me a hug and told me that they are praying for me and my family.  One friend admitted to me that she didn't know what to say as we cried together and really, she didn't need to say anything. 

After staring at a wall and crying for far too long, I felt like I needed to do something with my grief.  Hence began my search for a sapphire ring since that is September's birthstone which, as Brian said, to focus on the time that we did have rather than the time when our baby would have been born.  Me, in my ignorance, thought I was asking for a cheap ring probably no more than $30 for a nice one (feel free to insert sarcastic laughter).  I did find one as high as $1200 which made me laugh inwardly since I remembered the quote, "Is that dollars?  $1200?!!!  A cake is flour and water!  My first car didn't cost $1200!"  Good old Father of the Bride...  Probably a good thing that I didn't quote it out loud though.

While looking for a ring, I realized that jewelry cases are extremely tempting for children to press their faces against thus leaving scary looking facial imprints.  Specific children also enjoy trying on jewelry.  That would explain why some jewelers have areas set up for children with coloring books and crayons.

Seriously though, I found a fabulous one on sale at Kohl's for not too much above what I was originally planning thanks to a sale and I wear it often in remembrance our baby and God's goodness even when things aren't good.  God's grace has definitely been poured down on us in the form of friends and family who have stood by us, been there, and encouraged us as we move forward.  Thanks again.